Babies and other squishy things
My mother says that I was a serious adult in a kid's body, up until age eleven, at which point I started regressing. And it continues. Now, at 23, I am increasingly going through squeally fits of "ooh! babies! I wanna hold the cute wittle baby!," which I'm told is appropriate behavior for someone that is...ten. My boyfriend used to be disgusted by this behavior, but now I think he's resigned himself to it and thinks it's funny. One of his favorite activities is to parody me, squeaking in a voice several octaves above mine, the way all guys seem to think girls talk. Apparently we sound like fire alarms beeping at full volume. Whatever, I must confess that I am increasingly becoming that baby-obsessed young woman that men run away from.
Of course, this is a part of my personality that doesn't show up all the time. When I'm in an academic or professional setting, I often come across as very serious, not particularly sweet or naive, and ( I hope) intelligent. This demeanor intimidated and alienated my classmates, even before high school, so I started acting silly in order to show my peers that I was also a kid, that I wasn't always shooting down other people to give the right answer. I didn't dumb myself down, but I did become sillier. As an adult, I find myself increasingly retreating into this behavior as I get tired of acting like I know all the answers at work. After spending eight hours or so being the Mean Teacher that gives homework, I become the overgrown baby that fusses over cute animals. Also, there are moments, usually having to do with romantic relationships, where I feel like a child in that I have a kind of vulnerability and strength of emotion that I don't feel in other aspects of my adult life.
Psychological factors aside, though, who wouldn't become a goo-goo-ga-ga-ing mess over the following?
My boyfriend's cat is named Amos. Amos is a fat cat, and he's a friendly cat. He likes attention and is very affectionate, and his fat makes him soft and squishy. Holding Amos is like holding a realy furry baby, but unlike a baby he's never going to grow up to talk back to his parents and listen to Angry Boy Music. Having never had a pet, I was leery of Amos when I first started dating my boyfriend, but by the time we broke up I was so attached to him I seriously considered taking him with me when I moved out. I didn't, mostly because that would be stealing, and I didn't want an angry ex-boyfriend to take me to court. Now that the BF and I are back together, I fuss over Amos every time I see him. He's sixteen pounds of fatty catty goodness!
Ever since spending time with Amos, I've become increasingly attracted to cute animals because of their resemblance to human babies. If they're small, chubby, make high-pitched noises, and look at the world with a certain wide-eyed wonder (they could curious, dim-witted, or both, doesn't matter), they look like babies too me. And the animal in question doesn't even have to be animate. Take, if you will, the stuffed beluga:
This plush replica of the caviar factory resembles the stuffed animal the BF bought for me at the Shedd Aquarium the other day. To me, it looks like a baby. Specifically, it looks like a thalidomide baby:
This picture really inspires the "babies!" reaction in me. I think that that's becuase the baby looks happy and unaware of its disability, and its disability also inspires an additional desire to want to extend some sort of motherly care. While intellectually I understand that disabilities aren't "cute" ( I may be infantile at times but I'm not a moron), I still want to reach out and hold this baby and try to love it enough so that the short limbs won't seem like a real problem. They say that the more affection given to a baby, the more it accomplishes it is later in life, so wouldn't it be that much more important for a baby that faces distinct disadvantages from the get-go? Just sayin'. My reactions may be insipid but I don't think they're evil.
Of course, cute animals are not as demanding as a human child, and real babies only seem like an attractive option because I don't have to deal with the reality of children: dirty diapers, sleepless nights, college/braces, and neglected career goals. As long as I don't have a baby, I'll fuss over anything that is wide-eyed and chubby, regardless of species. Once I have a kid though, the bloom is off the rose.
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posted by Amanda @ 11:52 AM
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